now i'm old and feeling grey (o)

[leonora castillo]

[cs=2][bg=eeeeee][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,475px,true][atrb=cellspacing,0px,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true] [STYLE=font-family:georgia; color:#003366; border-bottom:2px solid #ffffff; margin-bottom:-15px; letter-spacing:1px; text-align:right;]THROUGH WOODS GROWN BEHIND THE PARK[/style] [STYLE=font-family:georgia; color:#111111; font-style:italic; letter-spacing:1px; text-align:right; margin-bottom:10px;]i asked god who i'm supposed to be[/style]
[bg=eeeeee][atrb=cellspacing,0px,true][atrb=padding,5px,true][STYLE=background-color:#e8e8e8; color:#111111; width:325px; height:325px; padding:15px; overflow:auto; text-align:justify; margin:5px;]Leo had never been particularly religious. Religions just seemed like a way to control people to her - tell them what to do, what they can't do, limit their beliefs and their hopes until they were narrowed down to one thing that was acceptable by one god and if you didn't agree with it, you were sinning. She hated that word. Sinning - sinner - sin - it all came down to doing wrong. But these religious people, these pious others, had no idea what it was like to do wrong, not really. There was a difference between doing wrong and doing evil; sometimes, you had to do wrong to save and keep the ones you loved protected. Sometimes, you had no other choice. But Leo had found herself troubled. For the past week or so, she had been restless in her sleep, avoiding food, keeping herself to herself and trying to keep out of conversation. She didn't realize what it was until the day actually came, and then she realized. It had been precisely twenty years since their parents had passed away. She remembered it distinctly. She didn't know if Alonzo could remember it - she sometimes forgot that they were the same age, she felt so much older - but she knew she could remember it. They had been killed for something-or-other (she never remembered that) and she remembered the officials taking her and her brother to the Orphanage, where they stayed until Leonora couldn't stand it there anymore. Her restlessness occurred often around this time. Today, the anniversary of their deaths (or was it the anniversary of their official deaths?) Leo made her way into a section of the world where she was most uncomfortable. The church was deadly silent, not currently in use for its regular occupants. She felt like she was putting herself in a tomb. The redhead sat down at the back of the main hall, the pew creaking uncomfortably beneath her. She rested her elbows on her knees, and her face in her hands. "Gloria al Padre, al Hijo y al Espíritu Santo," she muttered into her hands, rubbing her face as she paused with the unfamiliar, untested words. She felt almost like crying. It was strange. "Como era en el principio, ahora y siempre, por los siglos de los siglos." [/style]	[bg=eeeeee][atrb=cellspacing,0px,true][atrb=style,text-align:justify;][atrb=padding,5px,true][STYLE=border:5px solid #ffffff; margin:5px; text-align:center;][/style] [STYLE=font-family:georgia; background-color:#e8e8e8; color:#003366; border-bottom:2px solid #ffffff; text-align:center; margin-bottom:-15px]TAG(S)[/style] open! [STYLE=font-family:georgia; background-color:#e8e8e8; color:#003366; border-bottom:2px solid #ffffff; text-align:center; margin-bottom:-15px]WORD COUNT[/style] what is this [STYLE=font-family:georgia; background-color:#e8e8e8; color:#003366; border-bottom:2px solid #ffffff; text-align:center; margin-bottom:-15px]MUSIC[/style] dream - priscilla ahn [STYLE=font-family:georgia; background-color:#e8e8e8; color:#003366; border-bottom:2px solid #ffffff; text-align:center; margin-bottom:-15px]NOTES[/style] anyone's welcome to join. c:
[cs=2][bg=eeeeee][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,475px,true][atrb=cellspaing,0px,true][atrb=cellpadding,5px,true] [STYLE=font-family:georgia; color:#003366; border-bottom:2px solid #ffffff; margin-bottom:-15px; letter-spacing:1px;]THE STARS SMILED DOWN ON ME[/style] [STYLE=font-family:georgia; color:#111111; font-style:italic; letter-spacing:1px; text-align:right; margin-bottom:10px;]god answered in silent reverie[/style] [STYLE=text-align:right; font-size:10px; color:#e0e0e0; margin-top:-10px; margin-bottom:10px;]designed by NOWAKI of btn, lyrics from dream by priscilla ahn.[/style]